Hossegor! August 27, 2008 – Tags: ,

Sun. Surf. Girls. Nudity. Beer. Thats all there really is to describe Hossegor, not bad in my books, not bad in yours. Hossegor was also the place where the infamous FRANKIE would joining us. The south of France and Hossegor in particular is mine and most of the boys favourite place on this entire leg. It has the funnest surf, the warmest water and the hottest girls. Not to mention the contest site with free beer, or the free Goons of Doom concert, its just completely free FUN.
 
The waves for the contest were very very up and down, soo bad one day and so amazing the next. 4ft offshore pits before 12 and 8ft and raining by 2. But all in all it was definately the best waves we’ve had thus far. Besides the big nine point rides early on from Fish, Myself, Brenno and Sully Hossegor wasn’t a good contest for the old ten pack with most of us getting to the main round and only brenno and sully progressing to the round of 48. That didn’t mean we didn’t have fun though, i mean come on what did you think we would be depressed and bed ridden.
Undoubtably the greatest thing france, and Hossegor in particular, has to offer is the Giraffes. Which is a 3ft high glass complete with its own tap which you can fill with beer or, if your feeling rather “out there”, Rum and Coke or whatever your little heart desires. Very cheap but oh so dangerous. Because of the easy access to your next drink you seem to drink them much fast and with little regard for the future. Hossegor is the place that brings everyone together, there is only one real area to go out at night called central’ and all the bars are lined along one main walk way, which is not too good for innocent bystanders or good looking girls that happen to walk past a tale of 20 intoxicated Aussies.
 Another group of intoxicated Aussie hanging round in Hossegor were the garage punkers The Goons Of Doom, and the lovly lads would be playing a free show at the cream cafe saturday night for anyone willing to scream along to their songs. The night started out pretty cruisy with everyone out on the deck chatting up a storm, and playing some nice little drinking games to warm up for the night to come. When the boys started there wasn’t one person that wasn’t well on there way to oblivion. Highlights included the Goons handing a mic to new lead singer Matt Wilkinson who could only manage the words “GET FUCKED UP”, Great lyrics but a tad repetitive thanks anyway Matt, Owen Wright crowd surfing for the duration of the show despite his 6’2 frame and Sedz saluting their performance with a nude windmill. Anyone still alive stumbled, badly, to an after hours club called safari for more dancing. Fisher and Melling didn’t make it to safari instead deciding to have a wild boxing match that started in their room and extended out onto the front lawn finishing on the street. No one knows who won but if you ask Fish, Melling copped a hiding. Things were great in France.
 
The next morning our house finished and we were on the street, it definitely wasn’t expected but this would be the best and funniest day so far this trip, if not our life. At lunch Brenno decided that rather than feeling shit he would just get another beer and keep the ball rolling. We were all pretty easily persuaded when Brenno, Fish and Brett started up a conversation with a group of 17 year old Bi-Curious girls who cruelly teased us by fondling and kissing all arvo. The girls eventually had to leave to meet their parents but the beers and stories still flowed and the laughs didn’t stop. Around 4 o’clock there was a 20 strong crew. 
Luckily along the way we picked up two strays in the form of Damien Farenfort and Rudy Palmboom who remained sober and provided us with two drivers for the trip through Spain to Portugal. Now with three car loads of intoxicated Aussies and two, relatively, sober South Africans driving from France to Portugal you’d think there would surely be enough stories and drama to fill a whole season of a TV series. Some stories, sadly, cannot be told due to inappropriate content but the ones that will be told are still out of this world so stay tuned as the SAGA CONTINUES…